Friday, June 10, 2011

Questionable at Best (part 2)

Now on to the second part of my people judging...I mean people watching from the water parks.
This one involves swimsuits.  As a larger, chesty woman, I totally get the challenge of finding a swimsuit that sucks in, covers up, flatters, supports, and isn't ugly.  And I understand that you must love your body and be confident blah blah blah.  HOWEVER...I saw some people - men and women AND some children who need a friend to tell them "Sweetie....pick something else"

Here are some examples of swimsuit FAIL moments -

*To the teenage girl who had three really skinny friends....just because they had teeny bikinis on doesn't mean you should.  Sweetie, your tummy hung over the top of your bottoms....old man style.(and men....that doesn't mean its ok for you either)
*To the several women who had string bikinis - your back roll should not ever be hiding your string.
*To the insanely skinny girls in the really low slung two piece.  First, your hip bones shouldn't stick out further than your boobs and word for you - Cheeseburger.
*To the really old stooped wrinkly woman who was about a size 16.  Black Bikini - really?
*To the woman with the tiny infant.  Honey, I know you want to be in your pre-baby clothes but your tummy still looks like a stretch mark covered deflated balloon.
*And finally to both the man with a solidly hair-covered back and bald head and to the man with long pointy moobs (man boobs).  Swim Shirt please!  I pay a lot of money for my vision to be corrected, you made me kind of sad about it.

Then there were a few violations of the basic rules of swimsuits - White...never a good idea unless you have thoroughly tested it in your bathtub first.  Those weird suits that have just the thin piece of fabric down the front making them a "one piece" not a good look on most people.  And if you have to constantly pull your top up or your bottoms out of your might be wearing the wrong size.

That is my public service announcement for today ;) Back to regular programming tomorrow.

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